Feel my pain
by FangurlNL
Summary: What happens when Bella is reunited with her childhood love? Will she be able to get rid of a dangerous and violent man to be able to have a brighter future? What will Jacob do when the woman he loves is in serious danger? Just how far will he go to keep her safe? Rated M for violence, language and lemons. All human Jacob/Bella story.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters; I just own the product of my own imagination.

 **This is rated M for violence, language, lemons. If you're a prude or easily shocked, please find another story!  
Consider yourselves warned, so don't go reporting if you find anything offensive!**

 **A/N:**

 **This is an all human Jacob/Bella story.**

 **If you like Edward, don't read this, because he is a bastard in my story!**

 **Jacob Black is a young man living in the La Push reservation where he has lived all of his life.  
One evening he and some of the other guys from the reservation decide to go to a bar/dancing in Port Angeles.  
Then he sees someone he hasn't seen since she stopped coming over to her father's in Forks, because she was living with her mom and her mom was moving away to the other side of the country. It's Bella Swan.  
She's there with a man, they seem so very much in love.  
But things aren't always what they seem, are they?**

 **FEEL MY PAIN…**

Chapter 1

(Jacob's POV)

I was over at Quil's having a beer. We'd meet up at his place with the whole gang before driving to Port Angeles. I didn't have to drive this time, as Paul said he would, so I could relax and have a beer or two. Embry walked in and grabbed a beer from the fridge and flopped down on the couch beside me. "So, Wendy was cool with you coming with us tonight?" I asked him. He nodded, "Yea Wendy is going to hang with Kim, Emily, Leah and Nayla." Kim was Jared's girlfriend, Emily was Sam's, Leah was Paul's and Nayla was Seth's. Quil and I were the only two singles of the group, but we didn't mind. Quil decided to never get whooped, and I… I was fine with things the way they were at this point.

As soon as Sam, Paul, Jared and Seth arrived we got into the truck and drove to Port Angeles, playing loud music, just us guys having fun. Paul parked the car and we dropped our coats off at the cloakroom. We headed over to the bar and ordered our drinks, then leaned with our back against the bar looking around, to see if there were any familiar faces. All of a sudden it felt like a bolt of lightning shot through my head. I actually saw a familiar face! And my my, she looked great!

It was Bella Swan, Charlie Swan's daughter. She used to come over to Forks every summer to spend time with her dad, who had divorced her mother when Bella was at a young age. Charlie was a really close friend to my dad, Billy so as kids we used to hang out all the time; playing in the forest collecting berries and building tree-huts, or looking for seashells on the beach. She was a plump little girl back then, with long brown hair, which she usually wore in a braid, or a ponytail, a cute button nose, and the warmest chocolate brown coloured eyes.  
She didn't change much, although she was far from plump, and didn't wear her hair in a braid or a ponytail anymore, she still looked like Bella too me. Although her eyes… The look in her eyes, it was definitely not the same as I remembered her.  
Then my eyes moved to the man she had her arms wrapped around. I had no idea what it was, but something about him was off. _Way_ off…

(Bella's POV)

I stood there, my arms wrapped around Edward, looking at him adoringly, exactly the way he wanted me to look at him in public places. He smiled down at me, and kissed my forehead.  
We met a couple of years ago when I attended the Peninsula College in Port Angeles. He was ever so charming and instead of paying a whole lot of money for my dormitory, I moved in with him after a short while of dating. He was so good to me; he gave me everything my heart desired, he took me on holidays and went out with me every weekend. I had a great life, and I got to go to college too! I'm so lucky to have him.

He kissed the top of my head and then let go of me. I looked over and saw a group of shady figures looking at him. "You run along and have fun now, I have some _business_ to attend to," he said playfully spanking me. I nodded and walked to the dance floor. As I looked back one more time, I saw he took a place at the table with the shady figures, in the back corner of the bar. I really wished he didn't hang around with that kind of people though.

I stepped up on the dance floor and started to dance. I pulled my hair up off my neck, lifted it and then let it fall back over my shoulders while swaying my hips to the music. I felt a pair of eyes burn in my back, so I turned around to see who was looking. It was a handsome, buff young man, with russet colored skin, brown eyes and short, black hair. He looked at me as if he seemed to know me. I didn't recognize him though, but I liked the attention from a complete stranger so I smiled at him and kept on dancing my sensual dance, shaking my hips from left to right and rubbing my hands over my body. I knew that this was the way Edward wanted me to dance; he wanted everyone to see how hot his woman was. I kept looking into this handsome stranger's eyes, and I had no idea what he was thinking, but he didn't once take his eyes off of me.

(Jacob's POV)

Wow, I was standing at the bar, eyeing Bella Swan dancing in the most sensual way I have ever seen a woman dance. Well maybe not the most sensual way, but it definitely meant more to me to see her dancing. Quil noticed me staring and elbowed me. "Bro! She's so unavailable to you! She's already seeing someone, in case you hadn't noticed!" he shouted in my ear. _Yeah, way to pour salt in freshly ripped wounds, cousin, thanks a bunch!_ I elbowed him back, and then turned around to order another beer, breaking the staring that had been going on between Bella and me.

Next thing I knew I heard someone shouting. I could hear it, even over the loud music. I turned and saw the man that Bella came with shouting at her. He must have noticed the staring too as he was giving it to her straight.

But then something happened that no one had foreseen, he raised his arm and he slapped her right in her face. I heard a shrieking sound escape her mouth as his hand hit her face, and watched her drop to the ground. I couldn't believe my eyes. I have never seen such a thing before and that slap went right through bone and marrow. As if the slap wasn't bad enough he started pulling her arm, forcing her to get up. I was outraged! _How dare he hit her like that?_

I dropped my beer where I stood and just as I wanted to walk up to him to give him a taste of his own medicine, I felt someone grab onto my arm. "Don't bro!" Sam said, "We're not in our own territory, it wouldn't be wise to pull anything here."  
I clenched my fists, "I don't give a damn!" I shouted. Next thing I knew I was being dragged outside by all of the guys and pushed into the truck. "Don't do anything that would disgrace the Quileute, bro!" Sam said as the rest of the guys got in.  
"But- but… that was BELLA!" I shouted as Sam drove away.


	2. Chapter 2

**Previously on Feel my pain...**

 _I dropped my beer where I stood and just as I wanted to walk up to him to give him a taste of his own medicine, I felt someone grab onto my arm.  
"Don't bro!" Sam said, "We're not in our own territory, it wouldn't be wise to pull anything here."  
I clenched my fists, "I don't give a damn!" I shouted.  
Next thing I knew I was being dragged outside by all of the guys and pushed into the truck.  
"Don't do anything that would disgrace the Quileute, bro!" Sam said as the rest of the guys got in.  
"But- but… that was BELLA!" I shouted as Sam drove away._

Chapter 2

(Bella's POV)

I was standing in the bathroom, dabbing my eye and the side of my face that Edward slammed against the wall, before 'throwing' me into the car. I didn't cry; this wasn't the first time. He's just really stressed, trying to provide for us both. I watched the places where the skin had burst open and blood was pouring out. This time it was worse than usual though. I shouldn't have angered him by looking at that guy like that. I had no idea his _business_ meeting was already over and he had seen me dancing and looking at that guy. Why did I look at him anyway? He was staring at me as if he knew me, that was why and his handsome appearance caught my eye. He had something about him that made me feel safe, even though I had never met him.

I peered into the dark bedroom, at the place where he dropped his drunk body onto the bed. He hadn't moved yet. When this all started, I considered leaving him, but he was so upset, he got down on two knees and begged me not to leave him. The next time I tried to leave him he threatened to kill himself. The last time I wanted to leave him, he threatened to kill my father and make me watch him do it, before he'd kill me.

I looked down. My own life wasn't worth much to me, obviously with the way I let him treat me, but I loved my father and I could never live with myself if anything would happen to him because of me. Edward didn't allow me to go visit him, or anyone that used to know me. I wasn't even allowed to go to Forks, or La Push for that matter. I was to stay in Port Angeles, attend college, shop for groceries and do the household chores. I wasn't to go out for anything else without him. But that was merely because he was so scared of losing me. He always brought me lovely gifts, expensive jewellery, dozens of roses, rare perfumes and designer clothes.

Why was I even complaining again?

I looked into the mirror. _Hmmmmm…_

(Jacob's POV)

The look of that jack-ass slapping her so hard haunted me, even in my sleep. _How could any man hurt a woman like that?_ I had no idea how, but I was thinking about it for so long, that I saw the sun coming up again, without having had any sleep.

I decided to get up and take an ice cold shower. It made me feel a little more refreshed, but nothing could wash that one scene off of me. I walked into the kitchen to find my dad already up, getting ready for a fishing trip with his best friend, Charlie.

He looked at me and said, "Morning Jake, you look like you've seen a ghost?"  
"I did dad, you'll never guess who I saw when we went out last night!" I replied, while I poured myself a cup of coffee. Billy looked at me fascinated, "Do tell son!" I swallowed a hot sip of coffee. "Bella Swan," I almost whispered. Billy's face fell. "So she's hanging around in Port Angeles but she doesn't take any time to come visit her old man in Forks?" he snorted. I raised my hands in Bella's defence. "I think she's not in a position where she can come to Forks dad," I said. "What are you on about Jake?" he asked, squinting his eyes. "I have serious reasons to believe she is a victim of domestic violence," I carefully said. Billy's pupils widened, "Why are you saying that Jake? It's a serious accusation!" I sighed rubbing my neck, feeling the muscles there tighten as I re-played the scene I had seen yesterday. "Because I saw her man mistreating her," I gritted between my teeth. Billy closed his eyes. "If that's true, then I'll have to inform Charlie," he said. I knew he was right, but wouldn't it cause her even more problems? Billy patted my shoulder, "You did right telling me son," he said. "I'll inform Charlie and let him take his actions from there."

Then I heard a car honk. It was Charlie, picking my dad up for a fun day of fishing. I bet the fun would be out of it in no time once he'd hear what Billy had to tell him. I finished my coffee after my dad and Charlie took off, then I jogged to Sam's to talk about what we witnessed last night.

(Bella's POV)

When I woke up the next morning, Edward was already gone. I rubbed my eyes and a jolt of pain went through the right side of my face. I forgot how bad it hurt. I looked up and saw that Edward left a rose on my nightstand. I didn't feel much for the roses anymore, as every rose only symbolized every time he had done something to hurt me, physically or mentally. I grabbed the rose from my nightstand and threw it out of the open bedroom window.

I walked into the bathroom and looked at the right side of my face in the mirror. Good lord, it looked even worse than it did last night. Then I heard the sound of my phone… a text message! I walked over to my purse, took out my phone and read the text message.

 _Bells, dad here, I haven't seen you in so long, and it would mean so much to me if you could come over to have a cup of coffee this afternoon. I'll always love you darling. X_

I felt the tears burn in my eyes. I missed him too, but how could I show myself to him, looking like this? Not to mention Edward would flip if he'd find out I went to Forks. Edward I could deal with, but my dad asking questions, no, definitely not.

I rushed back into the bathroom, took a shower and then started covering up the bruises on my face with foundation. It actually worked, as long as I wouldn't come too close to my dad, he would never notice. I texted my dad that I'd be over at his place at two in the afternoon. If I made it there in time and got back in time, Edward never had to find out.

I fixed my hair and got dressed, then I grabbed an apple from the plate with fruit on the kitchen counter and a bottle of water from the fridge, and I ran to the car, parked in the garage. I put the keys in the ignition and checked the rear-view mirror.  
 _What was I thinking?  
_ I knew there'd be hell to pay if Edward found out, but I promised my dad now, so there was no turning back. I backed the car out of the garage and made my way to forks.

(Jacob's POV)

Just when I wanted to leave Sam's place, I received a text message from my dad, asking to meet with him and Charlie back at his place as soon as possible. I jogged back home to get the Rabbit and rushed my way over to Charlie's. "Where's the fire?" I asked grinning as I walked in. Billy looked at me, "Bella is coming over. "We're hoping to be able to make this an intervention." I nodded, "So we're gonna try and do what? Get her to admit that her boyfriend is mistreating her?" Billy sighed, "Well we hope we can find an opening as the conversation flows." I grumbled and leaned against the kitchen doorpost. I didn't think it would work, but heck, we could try.

I looked out the window and saw that is had started to rain. Then we heard a soft knock on the porch door. Charlie went to open the door. I heard soft talking, and moments later Charlie walked back into the kitchen with a soaking wet Bella right behind him. "I think you'll remember Billy Black?" Charlie gestured in Billy's direction. She nodded, keeping the right side of her face out of our sight. Charlie continued, "I don't know if you remember him, but that's Jacob Black."

She turned to look at me and I saw she was shocked because she involuntarily looked at me straight, enabling me to see the right side of her face. It was black and blue, with the skin burst in several places, and make-up dripping down her cheek.  
 _That slap couldn't have done that_! I thought to myself.  
When she saw the look on my face she must have realized that the rain had washed away her make-up and snatched a paper towel from the paper-towel-holder, sitting on the kitchen table. She panicked and covered her right face with the towel, asking if she could use the restroom to touch up her make-up. I opened my mouth to tell her no, but Charlie beat me to the punch, "Sure you can, but if you're thinking of covering up those bruises I can save you the trouble. Jacob here has seen you yesterday, and he saw what happened to you."

She lowered herself onto a kitchen chair, covering her face with her hands. Charlie pulled up a chair and sat beside her, Billy wheeled himself over to her other side.

(Bella's POV)

 _I should have known better than to come here._ I sat there a long time covering my face, listening to all the ways out Billy and Charlie were telling me about. I knew it would be no good, as Edward would always find a way around it. I looked at Jacob, who was still standing in the same position he was in when I arrived. He never took his eyes off of me, and that's when it dawned on me that he was that boy I used to play with, back when I was still visiting my dad on a regular base. I felt a little uncomfortable with his staring, but I could imagine him staring at me, I must be looking hideous.

I just let my dad and Billy spill their guts and nodded on occasion. Then it was my turn to tell them they had no idea what they were meddling with and that they shouldn't be interfering with my life.

Right before I had to leave, I agreed to put my dad under ICE, In Case of Emergency, in my phone. I gave both my dad and Billy a hug, thanking them for their concern, nodded at Jacob, not sure what to think. I got into my car and waved one last time, then I checked my watch. I was going to make it home in time, if traffic was nice enough.

As I was driving back to Port Angeles, flashbacks from my childhood flashed before my eyes.  
 _Stop it Jacob! Daddy! He's teasing me!  
_ Heh… that was when he was chasing me with a spider in his hand. A few more memories flashed through my mind, and then, the most important one came back to me. I was saying good-bye to Jacob, because I wouldn't be able to visit my dad anymore. Mom was moving to the other side on the states, for some odd reason.

I cried, then he pulled up my chin with his hand and dangled a hand made bracelet in front of my eyes. It had a wooden Quileute totem on it.  
 _Don't ever forget me Bella Swan…  
_ I closed my eyes and felt his warm lips on mine.  
Then, his tongue slid into my mouth…

He gave me my first kiss! I sighed and rubbed the bracelet that I still wore to this day. Of course Edward didn't know about any of that, nor did he of the true meaning of that bracelet. I told him it was just some souvenir from the La Push Reservation. I wanted to kick myself back then for 'betraying' Jacob like that, but it was that or…

Well that was now in the past. We were both grown up, and had our own lives. But I did regret one thing and was that I had forgotten about him.

I was finally home, and in time to have dinner ready before Edward came home too! I parked the car in the garage and got out to close the garage door. Then I walked into the house and shut the door behind me quietly. When I put my keys down on the little table next to the front door, a light switched on behind me. I felt my heart stop beating as I turned around. Edward was sitting in the ottoman glaring at me angrily.

"And where have _you_ been?" I heard him ask.


	3. Chapter 3

**Previously on Feel my pain...**

 _I was finally home, and in time to have dinner ready before Edward came home too!_ _  
_ _I parked the car in the garage and got out to close the garage door._ _  
_ _Then I walked into the house and shut the door behind me quietly._ _  
_ _When I put my keys down on the little table next to the front door, a light switched on behind me._ _  
_ _I felt my heart stop beating as I turned around._ _  
_ _Edward was sitting in the ottoman glaring at me angrily._ _  
_ _"_ _And where have_ _you_ _been?" I heard him ask._

Chapter 3

(Jacob's POV)

I woke up because my dad was messing around. I looked at my alarm clock; it was 12:21am. I had no idea why he would wake up at this time of night but I decided to check up on him. I walked into the living room and saw he was looking for something, although I wasn't sure if he knew what he was looking for.  
"Dad? What are you doing up and dressed at this time of night?" I asked tiredly. He looked up at me from his wheelchair and I saw he was as pale as we could be with our skin tone. "Dad? You look like.." I started. "Bella is in the hospital!" he half shouted. My mouth dropped, feeling the most horrible thought creeping up to me.  
"Charlie called me. He got a phone call from the Port Angeles Police Department, I guess because Bella put him in her phone under ICE." Billy explained. "But how…" I started.

My dad seemed to know what I wanted to ask because he interrupted me, "Their neighbor heard the entire fight, but she was scared to go over there, until she saw Edward leave the house. Then she decided to check up on Bella and called the police when she…found her…" Billy concluded. My head started spinning and my mouth ran dry... _What has he done to her?_ "So I promised to meet with Charlie, so I can keep him calm, otherwise he might go do something to that Edward that he can't be doing as a chief of police." Billy whispered. "Can I come, dad?" I carefully asked. Billy nodded, "Sure Jake, a big strong man like yourself is always welcome in these situations."

I ran back into my bedroom, grabbed a pair of jeans and a shirt. Put them and my sneakers on and by the time that was done, it appeared my dad had found his car keys. He pulled himself behind the steering wheel as I folded the wheelchair and put it in the back seat. Then, when I got in he drove us to Port Angeles where Charlie was at the police station hearing from his colleagues what had happened.

When Billy and I arrived at the police station, where we were to meet with Charlie, we heard him yelling all the way down the hall. "So you've heard her being mistreated for years and you haven't done anything? Dammit woman!" he shouted, followed by the sound of his fist banging onto the table really hard. We followed that sound, and as we approached a small office, Charlie was led outside by another officer, "That's enough for you Sir. You should focus on your daughter, not play tough guy with the only witness in this case." Charlie restored himself, wiping some tears from his cheeks. When he saw Billy and me standing there, he fell apart. "Please, take me to my little girl…" he whispered. And so we did. Not one of us spoke a word on our way over to the hospital.

We reported at the information desk and the lady there directed us to the floor and room where Bella was admitted. As we got closer to the room where we would find Bella, we started walking a bit slower, as if lead filled our shoes, afraid of how we would find her.

Billy and I stayed back at the hall as Charlie walked into the little room. We heard him cry and I wheeled Billy inside to check on them. What I saw there was awful. It looked like Bella was mistreated in the most terrible way, with cuts and bruises as far as my eyes could see. She had an oxygen mask on her face and she had an I.V. in her hand.

I put my hand on Charlie's shoulder, as he carefully clamped his hand around her small hand. Then a nurse came in, "Oh, hello, I trust you are Miss Swan's relatives?" Charlie nodded, "I'm her father…What happened to her? How is she?" The nurse urged Charlie and me to have a seat, so we sat around the bed, Charlie never letting go of Bella's hand. "She's seriously injured. Although there are no fractures, she has a lot of bruises. Her back is injured and she has a concussion. She has an oxygen mask to help her breath easier , as I am sure she'll need it," she sighed, pointing at the marks on her neck, "He clearly tried to strangle her." I clenched my teeth, "What about the I.V.?" She nodded, "We decided to give her some morphine to kill the pain."

Then Bella softly stirred and the nurse retreated to give us some time alone with her.

(Bella's POV)

I slowly woke up from what seemed to be the deepest sleep ever. I was so groggy, my entire head ached. I tried to open my eyes, but that even hurt. What was going on? "Bella?" I heard a familiar voice say. "Daddy?" I squeaked, trying to open my eyes. Gosh what happened to my voice? Or did I always sound so hoarse? I felt someone cling onto my hand so tightly, "Oh yes, yes baby I'm here!"

I carefully opened one eye blinking at the painfully bright light. There he was, my dad, looking at me with tears in his eyes. "Where am I?" I asked most confused. My dad patted my hand, "You're in the hospital baby, but you're going to be fine!" "Wh- why?" I managed to ask. I saw my dad put his head down, as I managed to open my other eye too. Then I noticed Billy and Jacob Black were there too. I tried to sit up and straighten myself a bit, but when I tried, a jolt of pain cut through me like a sharp knife. I hissed between my teeth, grabbed my back, and dropped back into the pillows. My dad had jumped from his seat, looking at me worried. And then it dawned on me, Edward put me here.

I closed my eyes and saw him punch me in my face, before he dragged me up the stairs and threw me into a corner of the bedroom. He tried to rape me, but I gave him such a hard time he settled for trying to strangle me. _I can't breathe!_ I grabbed my throat, and started hyperventilating. I felt the wounds on my throat, where my nails had scratched my skin when I tried to peel his hands off my throat. I pushed the oxygen cap onto my mouth and nose more firmly, sucking the air into my lungs deeply. "I thought I was going to die…when he was trying to strangle me," I whispered. I saw Jacob's fist shake in anger. Charlie kissed my hand, "You're not going back there, you're coming home with me, and we'll transfer your classes to Forks."

I nodded closing my eyes, I was in too much pain to resist anything, and home didn't sound so bad, after what happened to me. Charlie, Billy and Jacob left the room, giving me some rest. What about Edward? Will he be arrested and sent to jail for what he did? Did I have to testify? Would I be safe from him? I sank to sleep, reliving this horrible night over and over.

(Jacob's POV)

I leaned against the wall outside Bella's room. "So what's the next step?" I gritted between my teeth. Charlie put his head down. "As an officer I cannot do anything; this happened outside my jurisdiction and I am too involved. But as her father I will do my best to keep her safe," he vowed. And we all vowed that, for as long as it would be needed. We stayed the night in the hospital, sleeping on the benches outside Bella's room.

I awoke the next morning to the sounds of nurses doing to their work in the hallway, handing out medications, breakfasts and helping people go to the bathroom. I stretched and sat up straight, when I saw a doctor coming over to us. I shook Charlie, waking him up, and then I shook Billy. Charlie woke up so fast, it almost seemed he was struck by lightning. The doctor nodded at us checking his chart, "Mr. Swan?" "Y-yes?" Charlie replied. The doctor cleared his throat, "I have evaluated your daughter and if you have a safe place for her to stay, she can be discharged this afternoon." I felt my heart jump with joy. "There will have to be someone keeping an eye on her and helping her out as she continues to heal, and she'll need to take some medication too," he continued. I saw Charlie nod, tearing up. I bet the thought of bringing Bella back to Forks with him was overwhelming him. "She will need some counseling too, as she has been through some very traumatic experiences. I trust you will find a good counselor?" the doctor asked. "Of course we will doctor," my father replied. Charlie nodded, "I will do anything to help my daughter!"

(Bella's POV)

I woke up from the ruckus on the hospital's hallway. I tried to open my eyes, but the bright light shining into my eyes hurt, so I slammed my eyes shut again. _God I feel like I was hit by a truck or something._ I heard a soft knock on the door and croaked a "Come in." "Bella?" I heard my dad whisper. "Hmmmmm…." I barely managed to bring out. I felt his big, warm hand clutch mine carefully. "The doctor said it was ok for us to take you home this afternoon." A jolt shot through my body and my eyes flew open; wide open. "Don't worry, I mean my home, not your old home. You're never going back there honey, never!" I shut my eyes and remembered everything my dad said to me yesterday. About moving back in with him, transferring my classes. _But what about Edward? He'd go ballistic if I were to leave him._

Then I heard a nurse enter my room. "Morning miss Swan, I have some breakfast for you, and then you will be washed up and the doctor will come to check up on you before you will be discharged," she said in the most friendly way. I groaned and I heard my dad thank her. "C'mon sweetheart, you have to try to eat something." I opened my eyes looking at my dad's worried face. _He looked older than the last time we met. Worries must do that to a person, I guess._ I sat up a bit as my dad fixed my pillows behind my back. Then I grabbed a slice of toast and had a go, but the crunching of the toast caused my head to ache so badly. I ended up eating some pudding and drinking a glass of orange juice.

When I was done, two nurses came into the room; one of them cleaning out the tray while the other started preparing a bowl of warm water to help me wash up. My dad kissed the side of my head. "I'll be outside with Billy and Jacob waiting until you're ready, sweetheart." _Jacob's still here? Why was he still here?_ I nodded and tried to sit up straight as the nurse put the bowl of warm water, two wash cloths and a towel on the table beside the bed. "Will you be requiring some help miss? Or do you prefer to freshen yourself up?" the nurse carefully asked. "I'll do it myself, thanks," I whispered as I grabbed a washcloth and nodded at the nurse. "Very well miss, I'll be at our desk, just use the button to call me when you're ready, or if you need any help," she said putting a pile of clean clothes on the bed within my reach.

I sighed as I started to wash my aching body. The warmth of the water felt pleasantly good to my sore skin. I closed my eyes and thought of going home to my dad's. I loved living there…


	4. Chapter 4

**Previously on Feel my Pain...** _ **  
**_ _When I was done, two nurses came into the room; one of them cleaning out the tray while the other started preparing a bowl of warm water to help me wash up. My dad kissed the side of my head. "I'll be outside with Billy and Jacob waiting until you're ready, sweetheart."_ _Jacob's still here? Why was he still here?_ _I nodded and tried to sit up straight as the nurse put the bowl of warm water, two wash cloths and a towel on the table beside the bed. "Will you be requiring some help miss? Or do you prefer to freshen yourself up?" the nurse carefully asked. "I'll do it myself, thanks," I whispered as I grabbed a washcloth and nodded at the nurse. "Very well miss, I'll be at our desk, just use the button to call me when you're ready, or if you need any help," she said putting a pile of clean clothes on the bed within my reach._

 _I sighed as I started to wash my aching body. The warmth of the water felt pleasantly good to my sore skin. I closed my eyes and thought of going home to my dad's. I loved living there…_

Chapter 4

(Jacob's POV)

Later that afternoon we got to take Bella home. When we arrived at Charlie's place, Charlie put Bella to rest on the couch in the living room and Charlie, my dad and I retired to the kitchen. Charlie was still on call and he was very anxious about having to leave Bella alone. My dad tried to calm him down. "C'mon Charlie, we've been friends for as long as we can remember! We'll be glad to help you and Bella out in any way that we can." He then turned to face me. "I'm pretty sure that big, strong son of mine can get the job done while you're away. And who knows, maybe Jacob and Bella spending time together will put things back into perspective for _them_." "Dad…" I scowled. But my dad raised his hand to silence me. "Don't back-talk to me boy, your old man knows what's best for you."

To be honest, he was right. We always have been the closest of friends. I closed my eyes thinking of those days. _I don't want to leave Jake, I really don't! Don't ever forget me Bella Swan…_ I snapped out of it. Who was I kidding? She had forgotten all about me, whether it was willingly, or forced upon her.

I got up from my chair, walked to the sliding doors between the kitchen and the living room and leaned against the doorpost. I watched Bella as she slept, her chest heaving peacefully in an even breathing pattern. My eyes wandered her body, the places where she must be hurting. And then my eye fell upon something I hadn't seen in the longest time. The charm-bracelet around her wrist; the one with our tribe's totem. The one I gave her when we had to say good-bye. She was still wearing it, after all this time? I must have meant something to her then!

"Jake? Are you ok?" I heard my dad ask. I turned around d swiftly. "I'll do it dad!" My dad and Charlie beamed at me equally happy and proud. "Thank you Jacob," Charlie said. "Thank you for being willing to look after my darling daughter." I nodded, sat back down at the kitchen table and felt my thoughts drift back to that one day that should have never happened. The day my Bella was taken from me…

(Bella's POV)

His eyes pierced into mine as he slowly got up from the ottoman he was sitting in. "Well? Where – have – you – been?" he repeated slowly as he walked towards me. "I er….Well you see….I was um…." I stammered. Now he was standing so close to me that I could smell the alcohol in his breath and see that his otherwise golden-brown eyes were almost black. "How many times have I told you not to leave the house unless it's for school?" he almost spat out in my face. I squeezed my eyes shut and cowered, knowing what was to come. Before I expected it I felt his fist make contact with my left eye. A sharp burning pain jolted through my head as I fell to the ground. "Now you see what you made me do? I don't want to have to discipline you, but you just don't listen, do you?" he half shouted, grabbing me by my wrists. "I'm sorry! I'll never do it again!" I pleaded. "You shouldn't have done it in the first place!" was his reply as he started dragging me up the stairs by my wrists. I started kicking my feet and screaming. "Please! Don't do this! I promise I'll never do it again!" He reached the top of the stairs and let go of my wrist for a second.

I groaned as my back was sore from scraping over each of the steps and tried to crawl away from him. He punched me again, right in my stomach. I groaned and curled up like a little ball, wrapping my arms around my stomach. Another punch to the left side of my face. I screamed in pain and then he grabbed my legs and dragged me into the bedroom, where he tossed me into a corner. "You need to be severely punished for your disobedience!" he panted as he started to unbuckle his belt. If I could have crawled up the wall, I would have, I was so scared. I had never seen him like _this_ before. He dropped his trousers and walked up to me. "Please no…." I begged. He grabbed me by my hair, forced me to lay flat on the ground and started ripping my clothes off of my body. I started to kick my feet and wrestle to get out of his restrain. He tried to remove my panties with his one free hand and then I just started to scream at the top of my lungs. "Shut up bitch!" _slap_ "SHUT UP!" _punch._ I couldn't stop screaming. I did it out of self-preservation.

Then I felt his hands around my throat and he started to squeeze. He was trying to strangle me! My hands flew to where his hands were squeezing and I tried to peel them off of my throat. I felt my nails scratching the skin of my throat. I got so light headed… _I can't breathe… I can't scream…_

Then I felt two soft, warm hands grab me by my shoulders gently. They were nothing like Edwards hands. "Bella? Wake up! Are you alright?"

(Jacob's POV)

Bella's eyes flew open as I softly shook her and she nearly jumped up from the couch, gasping for air trying to remove something I couldn't see from her throat. "Calm down!" I carefully grabbed her hands and urged her to sit down. "It was just a bad dream. He can't hurt you anymore..." She slowly nodded, coming to her senses. That bastard must have done terrible things to her, so terrible that they'd even haunt her in her sleep. "Can I get you anything?" I asked once she calmed down a bit. She nodded. "A cup of coffee please," she squeaked. I got up from the couch and walked into the kitchen to make a fresh pot of coffee. Horrible scenario's flashed through my mind of what that son of a bitch could have done to her.

I poured water in the coffee machine, then added coffee and switched the machine on. I heard some soft shuffling behind me and when I turned around she had appeared in the kitchen doorway. She blinked against the bright kitchen light and whispered, "Where are our dads?" "Well, your dad was on call so when he got paged, he had to go to work. And my dad was exhausted so I sent him home." She nodded. "But you really didn't have to stay here. I wouldn't want to keep you from all the fun stuff you're missing out of now…" she whispered. I looked down at my feet. _Does she really think I have anything better to do than looking after her?_ Truth was I haven't been able to commit to any woman after Bella and I shared that one moment. Of course I had dates and a bit more, but I never managed to take those relationships farther than a one-nighter. "No it's alright. I promised both our dads to be here if you need anything." "Ok, I just feel bad about keeping you from your day to day activities," she whispered as she carefully lowered herself on a chair.

I poured each of us a mug of coffee and sat down at the table across from where Bella was sitting. She scooped two spoons of sugar in her coffee and stirred it silently for a while. Then she started to smile to herself. "I must sound so stupid to you, squeaking and whispering…" she whispered. I looked up from my coffee mug. "No you don't. I think it's awful because of what has been done to you that made your voice this way!" I exclaimed. She looked down and stirred her coffee again. "I just hope it's not forever…" she whispered and then she took a sip of her coffee. We drank our coffee in silence and when Bella finished her coffee she got up and said that she was going to try and get some sleep. I nodded, put the mugs in the sink and watched her climb up the stairs.

I sat back down at the kitchen table and sank away in my thoughts. I had no idea how to handle this situation.

(Bella's POV)

When I reached the top of the stairs, I instinctively went into the direction my room used to be. I placed my hand on the doorknob and slowly turned it, a bit anxious to see what my room would look like after all those years of my absence. hen the door was fully open it dawned upon me that my room was exactly the way I had left it. I guess my poor dad didn't have the heart to change a single thing about it. I slowly walked into my old room, my sanctuary. I stroked the wood of the dresser where I kept my socks, underwear, bathing suits. The curtains hanging in front of the bay window. The stuffed animals sitting on the shelve across from my bed. My grandmother's handmade quilt on my bed. I closed my eyes and I remembered Jake climbing in the tree, softly knocking on the window. I would let him in and we'd talk for hours...

I shook my head and dragged myself into the bathroom. I splashed some cold water onto my face and looked at myself in the mirror. _Ew…_ I shuddered at the sight. _H_ _ow could I let him do that to me?_ I freshened myself up, took some sleeping pills and then retired to my own little sanctuary, collapsing on my bed. I fell asleep in no time; those medicines worked a miracle.

 **A/N: Well here's my first Author's note. I hope you like what I have come up with so far. I'd love to receive all your feedback, so please leave a review!  
Also, on my profile, I have pitched an idea for another story I am working on. Please let me know in the poll, if you're into this idea I have! Untill the next chapter!**

 **-x-**


	5. Chapter 5

**Previously on Feel my Pain...  
** _I shook my head and dragged myself into the bathroom. I splashed some cold water onto my face and looked at myself in the mirror._ _Ew_ _…_ _I shuddered at the sight. H_ _ow could I let him do that to me?_ _I freshened myself up, took some sleeping pills and then retired to my own little sanctuary, collapsing on my bed. I fell asleep in no time; those medicines worked a miracle._

 _ ****_Chapter 5

(Jacob's POV)

The next morning I woke up on the sofa at Charlie's place. I heard the rattling of kitchen utensils, got up from the sofa and stretched. When I walked through the sliding doors dividing the living room and the kitchen I saw Charlie fidgeting. He was opening the kitchen cabinets, then closed them only to open a drawer and closing that too. "Morning Charlie. Are you looking for something?" I said rubbing the back of my neck. "Oh! Morning Jake! Ehm yea I am looking for the spatula. Have you seen it?" Charlie replied while pulling open another cabinet only to be showered by a box of breakfast cereals and some boxes with flour and other baking supplies. I grinned, reached to the rack beside the stove and grabbed the spatula. "Here you go Charlie, what do you need it for?" I said, handing Charlie the spatula. "Thanks Jake, uhm... I thought I'd make Bells some of her favorite blueberry pancakes for breakfast..." he replied looking at me with this emotional look on his face. I nodded. "I see. Need any help?" I asked. Charlie happily accepted as he couldn't help but feeling lost in the kitchen.

I remembered that when Bella still lived here she did most of the cooking, even when she was still so young. She had a talent for cooking and her old man sure didn't mind. It was either that, or having dinner at the local diner. I helped Charlie make the batter for the blueberry pancakes. I felt just as helpless in the kitchen, because I didn't know the first thing about cooking, but I wanted Bella to not worry about anything for a change. So we baked the ugliest batch of blueberry pancakes, squeezed some fresh orange juice and made a fresh pot of coffee. I placed the plate of pancakes in the oven so they wouldn't get cold before Bella woke up.

Charlie poured us both a cup of coffee and we took a seat at the kitchen table. We sat there, looking at each other for a while. Then, Charlie cleared his throat. "So Jake," he started. This sounded serious and I felt a bit anxious. I opened my mouth to reply, but then he continued, "I know the way you used to feel about Bella." My jaw dropped. But then again, both our dads always knew everything, so I shouldn't be surprised. "I was just wondering, if she had never left, if you two would have still been together today?" Charlie carefully asked.  
 _I closed my eyes and I felt how my lips softly brushed hers._  
 _The sweet smell of her breath tingled my nostrils._  
 _I nipped on her bottom lip and she slightly opened her mouth in reply._  
 _I carefully slid my tongue into her mouth._  
 _I felt like I was riding a roller coaster, kissing the love of my life. And at the same time, my heart broke because she was leaving._

I looked back up at Charlie, "If it would have been up to me alone... yes, we would still have been together and none of these bad things would have ever happened to her..." Charlie nodded and hummed, I guess he saw me mesmerizing. Charlie is anything but a fool. He must know I still love her more than anything on this earth. "Be careful with her Jake, she can't get hurt again..." Charlie grunted. I guess that was his way of giving me his blessing to try and win Bella over? But I don't think Bella will ever be able to let anyone get that close to her again. And I can't blame her...

(Bella's POV)

 _Don't ever forget me Bella Swan..._ _  
_Butterflies... that's what you're supposed to feel when you kiss someone. Not the chills creeping up your back as he clings his cold hand into your neck, nearly pulling out your hair. I shook my head as I stared at the ceiling. I was so confused. I loved Jacob, and I am pretty sure he loved me. I never loved Edward, I loved the way he made me feel...at first. After that first beating I was just too scared to leave.

I got out of bed still groggy from the sleeping pills and decided to take a quick shower. Then I opened my cabinet to pick an outfit. It had to be something that would cover pretty much all of my ugly, mistreated body. A pair of skinny jeans, a turtle neck sweater and my old Dockers. I pulled my hair back into a ponytail to at least look like I was all taken care of. Then I walked downstairs and into the kitchen where I found Charlie and Jake, and a set kitchen table with blueberry pancakes, fresh squeezed orange juice and fresh coffee. Wow, they went out of their way.

"Morning dad," I whispered planting a kiss on his cheek. "Morning Jake," I whispered, nodding at him. Just as I sat down on the kitchen chair Jake held out for me, we heard a ruckus coming from outside. And the next moment Billy wheeled himself into the house. "Good morning all!" he enthusiastically shouted. I smiled at him whispering, "Good morning Billy." Billy planted a kiss on my forehead, winked at Jake and rolled himself to the other side of the table. "Ohhhhh I'm starving! What's for breakfast?" he asked rubbing his hands. Jake pointed at the oddly shaped blueberry pancakes on the plate. "Oh my! What's that? Is that the 'after' picture of an accident in a tunnel?" Billy joked. "Shut up dad!" I heard Jake say sulkily. "Well I bet they taste great," I whispered as I took two pancakes and placed them on my plate. In the corner of my eye I saw Jake grinning as we all dug in.

These pancakes tasted just like when I make them. I remembered how Jake was always watching me when I made them. Then I realized just how often he spent his time with me.

(Jacob's POV)

After breakfast I helped Bella clear the table and wash the dishes. Charlie leaned back in his chair, "So, you kids got anything planned for today?" I shrugged looking at Bella and then back at Charlie. "Well, I would like to go out for a stroll actually. It's a real summer's day and I heard it's going to be hot," Bella whispered. Charlie sat up, "Well there's just no way you're going to take a stroll alone Bells!" "Oh come on, it's as safe as it can get here!" I heard Bella object. I saw all color disappear from Charlie's face. Was he hiding something? "Dad? Is something wrong?" Bella carefully asked. Charlie rubbed his face, "Edward's bail was paid, so he is awaiting the investigation and the trial as a free man." _Oh hell no, this can't be! Not after what he had done to Bella!_ I slammed my fist against the wall and punched a hole in it. " _That's_ why you can't go for a stroll alone, Bells," Charlie explained. "But I think some fresh air would do Bella good, Charlie," Billy intervened. "Would your mind be at ease if Jake would go with her?" Smooth dad, real smooth... Charlie nodded, "I suppose I can trust her in Jake's more than capable hands." Oh great, they're both in on it. Billy smiled, "That's settled then! Be sure to bring your bathing suits! The water of La Push beach is delightful this time of year!" Oh yea, they were up to something alright...

 **A/N: Yes, she's back with another note. I have gained a few new followers, but have not received any reviews! Booooooo to all the peepers. Just kidding. But reviews are what keeps me going to pleaaaaase leave some love!  
Until next time! **

**-x- Twilight0320**


	6. Chapter 6

**Previously on Feel my pain...**

 _Charlie rubbed his face, "Edward's bail was paid, so he is awaiting the investigation and the trial as a free man." Oh hell no, this can't be! Not after what he had done to Bella! I slammed my fist against the wall and punched a hole in it. "_ _That's_ _why you can't go for a stroll alone, Bells," Charlie explained. "But I think some fresh air would do Bella good, Charlie," Billy intervened. "Would your mind be at ease if Jake would go with her?" Smooth dad, real smooth... Charlie nodded, "I suppose I can trust her in Jake's more than capable hands." Oh great, they're both in on it. Billy smiled, "That's settled then! Be sure to bring your bathing suits! The water of La Push beach is delightful this time of year!" Oh yea, they were up to something alright..._

Chapter 6

(Bella's POV)

After the dishes were done, and my dad and Billy agreeing on letting me go out on a stroll under Jake's supervision I went upstairs to put on my bikini under my clothes. Maybe, if Jake would promise not to peek, I could go for a quick dip in the water. I really missed La Push beach, the refreshing water, the screaming seagulls, the sound of the waves crashing onto the beach. I grabbed a towel, stepped into my flip flops and took a final look at myself in the mirror. Pretty much my whole body was concealed, except for the marks on my neck, but Jake had already seen them, so it wouldn't bother me if he saw those.

We took off to Jake's house so he could get his swimming trunks before we headed to La Push beach. We didn't talk as much as we used to. Then, all of a sudden, Jake reached down and picked a flower. I looked at him when he turned to face me. He gently tucked the flower behind my ear and smiled at me carefully. He used to do that every time we were out walking, or playing and he found a flower that reminded him of me. I am so not worthy of this gesture, I thought as I looked down shyly. He smiled at me and we carried on walking towards La Push beach. We used to run, laugh and talk all the way there, but now it seemed that we ran out of things to talk and laugh about. We both grew up, went through things and maybe we even outgrew each other. I didn't want to think about that, but I feared it was so. Can something, that was once true love, unconditional friendship, fade away with time? I couldn't shake the sorrow I felt in my heart, thinking of that possibility.

(Jacob's POV)

By the time we had reached La Push beach we still hadn't spoken a word. We just looked at each other occasionally, our eyes meeting for a second and then we'd both look away. We were both uncomfortable with this silence. What was she thinking? What was she feeling? I wished with all my heart I could hear her thoughts, see what's in her heart.

I watched Bella walk towards the water's edge, looking at the sea longingly. I knew how much she loved to swim. We both loved to swim, together. "Go on then, I know how much you want to swim," I carefully urged her. She turned around and looked at me, "Ok, but could you look away for a moment?" My heart broke for her for feeling about herself the way she did. But I respected her so I turned around and when I did I heard her clothes ruffling and dropping onto the sand. Then there was silence, followed by her soft voice, "You can look now." I noticed that her voice was returning to normal. Which was good, because I loved hearing the sound of her voice.

I turned around and looked at her. She was sitting in the water, with her knees pulled up to her body and her arms wrapped around her legs. "Can I join you?" I carefully asked. She nodded at me, "Sure you can." I took off my shirt and my shorts and stood there in my swimming trunks. I walked over to her and sat down in the water beside her. "Why are you so desperately trying to conceal yourself?" I asked her looking into her eyes. She looked down, "Well I don't exactly look, ehm... hot, you know?" "That's nonsense, you always look beautiful to me!" I exclaimed a bit too enthusiastic. She looked at me with a little smirk on her face. "I'm sorry... That was uncalled for," I said. "No no, it's sweet," she replied, "I just wish I could see what you see." "Believe me, I wish that too. You're so much more than what you give yourself credit for," I whispered.

(Bella's POV)

I can't believe he said that! But he was right. I didn't have what you would call a high self-esteem. We sat there in the water for a while, looking at the seagulls floating in the air and the sun in the sky. "So, what do you say we go for a swim," Jake suggested getting up and wading further into the water. I really wanted to swim, but that required me to get up.

I guess Jake saw the hesitation on my face because he extended one hand and covered his eyes with the other, "Alright, alright, come on..." I got up, waded through the water towards him and put my hand in his big, warm hand. As he closed his hand around mine, for a moment I felt the way I felt when he took my hand when we were kids. I loved his big warm hands. Even though we were like a year apart in age he has been taller than me for as long as I could remember.

I looked up and our eyes met. He was looking at me, but not at my body, or my face... His eyes were peering into mine, as if he was looking straight into my soul. I used to love it when he looked at me like that, but now I wasn't sure what to feel or think. He softly pulled me deeper into the water and when we reached a deep enough spot we started swimming. He dove under water and I followed him. As we explored this beautiful underwater world, he never let go of my hand. When we got back up for air he playfully splashed some water in my face. I giggled and splashed water in his face. He splashed some more water my way and I playfully shoved him. He pretended to be insulted, as he always did, grabbed me and lifted me up above the water. I shrieked, closed my eyes tightly and waited for the moment that he threw me in the water. But instead I heard a gasp and he lowered me back down gently. I looked at him. His face was as pale as a Quileute could get.

(Jacob's POV)

 _Oh-my-God..._ We were having a great time and I was about to toss her into the water... But when I held her up in mid air and looked up I saw them... Those bruises and marks on her body. They looked worse than I could have ever imagined and it shocked me. _That...BASTARD!_ He hurt my Bella beyond anything I could ever just imagine.

I saw Bella looking at me, "Jake? Are you ok?" Dear Lord and all that's holy, she is the one carrying those wounds and she's asking _me_ if I'm ok? I shook my head, trying to suppress the thoughts of what I'd do to that Edward guy if he ever crossed my path, "I'm fine, I just..." "You saw my body, didn't you?" Bella said. I nodded. "That was the way I looked at myself when he first..." she swallowed, blinked her eyes and looked away. "Just how long has he been doing this to you?" I asked her, carefully grabbing her hands, guiding her back onto the beach. "For far too long, that I am sure of," she sighed. "Every time he was abusive with me I told myself I was leaving him this time, but he always managed to make me feel sorry for him, or be scared of him so I wouldn't leave him..." she explained. I looked into her eyes, "I will _never_ hurt you Bella. You are worth so much more!" She nodded, "I know you wouldn't hurt me Jake, I know..."

 _I love you Bella... I wish you could see that I still do, and oh how I wish for you to love me back... I would be a much better man to you than anyone could ever try to be... I would never hurt you, or make you cry, I would never hit you or force you to do something you don't want to do..._

As if I would ever have the courage to tell her that... We dried ourselves, got dressed and walked back to Charlie's home just as silently as when we walked towards the beach this morning.


End file.
